Diary of a College Student #1

Portrait of the Artist in the Near Future, Hopefully

8:15 am

I am sipping coffee and worrying. Today is the placement exam I have been studying for since I quit my job. I am wearing a pastel-checked shirt under a brown v-neck sweater. As I was dressing I decided that if I look bookish it might boost my score. I see a similar thought process in the minds of my classmates who wear Lakers' jerseys.

I have already taken the test once, and failed as you may have surmised, so this is my last chance. If I fail again I will have to take Biology and Chemistry classes. I only failed by 5 points last time, and the extent of my studying was that I had taken these courses in High school, and I watch Jeopardy, so I am cautiously optimistic that hours of studying will give me an edge.

That is a lie. I will be crushed if I don't pass. Not only because it will set my plan back an entire semester, but also because it is expensive to buy books, especially if you have already read parts of them. If I don't pass, my very immediate goal will be to not sob.

I studied pretty hard. In order to learn this stuff I actually had to sit around my apartment and read a textbook. Without the aid of lectures, labs, or 6 days off between chapters, it was hard to make some of the material stick. I am sure I could have spent more time studying than I did, and if I fail I will feel very guilty about this, but it is probably the hardest I've studied for any one test ever. This is fitting since I am trying to learn 2 full classes worth of material in about 2 weeks. Needless to say, if I pass, my immediate goal will be to go directly to the pub and party like a science nerd.

3:58 pm

I passed!

I received an 80/100 on the exam, raising my score by almost 33% over my first try from an F to a solid B-, making me officially average at science!

I can't really think of anything insightful to say about all this without sounding like a total boast, so I'm going to cut it off right here by saying that I am very proud of myself, and I am looking forward to enjoying my final weekend of freedom by watching the NFL playoffs and silkscreening more t-shirts like the one above.

Thank you for your support.